


Keeping Up Appearances

by Caedmon



Category: Marvel, Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Betting on a relationship, Exposed, F/M, Implied Smut, Not Canon Compliant, Secret Relationship, actively works against AoU's canon, keeping up a cover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-25
Updated: 2015-08-25
Packaged: 2018-04-17 05:20:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4653870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caedmon/pseuds/Caedmon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint and Natasha agree to come up with a cover to hide their relationship. His is not what she's expecting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Keeping Up Appearances

**Author's Note:**

> This fic turned out to be a wayward teenager to write. It did not do what I wanted it to do. I intended it to be humorous...I never intended any sexy or angsty components to it at all. And yet, here we are. We're going to tell ourselves that this is the first thing I've written in over a month and move on, counting it as rust. 
> 
> I own nothing but the mistakes, since I have no beta.  
> comments and kudos are the lifeblood of the muse (who apparently needs a timeout sometimes, too. Maybe you could help with that as well?)  
> come talk to me! clintasha-n-olicity.tumblr.com

Clint’s fingers threaded through her red hair and gave a little tug. Natasha always went a little crazy every time he did that, and the bastard _knew_ it. She growled and sought out the hollow behind his ear in retaliation. He practically purred, and she smiled against his neck. 

“Did you get it handled?” she said, and fought back a giggle when he shuddered against her lips.

“Yeah,” he grunted, moving his hands to her waist and pulling her onto his lap. She acquiesced without putting up any resistance. Natasha gave him hell, and oh what a good time they had battling each other for dominance in the training room, in the bedroom, in basically every area of their lives, but there was no real struggle. Natasha belonged to Clint, and Clint belonged to Natasha. It was understood. They were partners and equals.

She bit her lip, mimicking the bite he had on her earlobe, and rolled her hips in his lap, following the pull of his clutched hands on her hips. “Its all fixed with Fury?” she demanded breathily. 

He grunted an agreement into her neck, still pulling her into his lap demandingly, nipping at her neck.

She wanted to drop it and let him have his way, oh she wanted to let him have his way _so badly_ , but this had to be settled first...it _had_ to…

“Clint…” she breathed against his ear, then clutched his shoulders when he nipped her neck. “Clint, we have to make sure…” He muttered against the underside of her jaw, trailing kisses towards her mouth, and she started bringing her hands up to his face to catch his attention. Slowly, of course, because her fingers were distractible, and Clint’s arms, back and shoulders were dancing around under her hands. Surely letting her hands wander a moment wouldn’t...no. This was too important. They had to maintain their cover. 

“Clint.” She sat up, and did her best to sound unaffected, bringing her hands to his shoulders. “We have to be sure. No one can know.” 

Clint took advantage of her loss of proximity to whip her shirt from her with speed that impressed even Natasha, before crushing her back to him, whimpering into her mouth at the feel of her skin against his. Natasha didn’t bother fighting his kiss. Her heart wasn’t in the fight, her heart was in the capture. 

Clint’s lips left hers and started tumbling down her neck, towards her collarbone and lower. He talked as he went, the little puffs of air that accompanied his words causing her to have to use every ounce of will she could muster to pay attention to him. “I told you, Nat, I got it handled.” He nipped the spot behind her ear and she clutched his shoulders. “No one will know about us. The Avengers won’t know about this.” He ground himself against her center again. “No protocols are being broken as far as they know.” His head dipped lower to the place where her arrow necklace lay, and he pressed a fervent, open-mouth kiss there. “Fury helped me set it up.” Her bra was suddenly gone, and she made a noise she didn’t recognize when he lifted her and gently laid her under him, kissing her soundly. 

“So we’re still undercover?” she panted when he let her breathe.

“Relax, Nat.” He brushed the hair away from her face. “Fury and I came up with an amazing cover story. Airtight. You’ll see.” Clint kissed her again, softly. Almost chastely. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’d really like to get Nick Fury out of my mind when I’m lying in bed with you.”

She giggled just before he cut her off with his lips.

>>\------->

She’d excused herself to the porch, saying she needed a minute of air. Laura had smiled benevolently, and Natasha hoped nobody else had seen when she’d gotten Clint’s attention and silently demanded he come with her.

 _”You hired a wife?_ ” she hissed at him as soon as he was within earshot, having followed her to the barn.

“Yeah,” he said quietly back to her, jamming his hands in his pockets, proud of himself.

“A _family_?”

“Well, yeah,” he said, a little uncertain now.

“Are you out of your fucking _mind_ , Barton! I never said to _hire a wife and kids_!”

“Oh I’m ‘Barton’ now, am I?” he chortled, leaning against the tractor. “Go on, then, Nat, what was your great idea? How were you going to keep us secret and safe? You were the one so hellbent that they never know about us.”

“I don’t know what I thought you were going to do! But a _wife and kids_ , Clint!”

He shrugged. “It worked. They believe it. Makes more sense than you and Banner, anyway.” He spit the name like it tasted bitter. “Everyone thinks that’s absolutely stupid, and they give me pitiful looks whenever you’re…” he made a waving, dismissive gesture then crossed his arms angrily. “Doing your flirting thing.”

“Oh, you don’t like flirting, so you decided to bypass it by going straight to ‘wife and kids with baby on the way’? Is that it?” Natasha’s tone was acid.

He leaned forward, his voice dropping dangerously, the vein in his forehead throbbing angrily. “Yeah, so maybe I didn’t want to fake the relationship! This was supposed to be a fallback in case of an emergency, not something to flaunt around for everyone to see!” 

“Oh, is that it? You got a couple of kids and found a woman just so you wouldn’t have to flirt? D’you knock her up, too?”

Clint raised a hand. “Now you wait a minute, you know good and well -”

“Did you?” Natasha demanded, and she wasn’t aware that the tears were flowing. “How long have you had this family on the side, Clint? Or am I the side piece? Your ass for while you’re on the road?”

Clint grabbed her by the elbow, jerking her close and shoving the fingers of his free hand into her hair to trap her next to him. “Don’t ever, _ever_ degrade yourself like that again, Natasha,” he growled against her mouth before he captured her lips, claiming her and giving himself to her at once. She hesitated, didn’t respond at first, and he was having none of that. He moved his mouth against hers, pleading, and she opened to him. He kissed her for a few moments, holding her close as he could before he realized that this was not a time for body language. 

He broke the kiss and pulled away, wiping her cheeks with his thumbs and putting his forehead against hers. “Natalia Alianovna Romanova, I belong to you. This,” he indicated the house and scene inside with fractional move of his eyes and head, “is a cover. It’s not real. You’re what’s real. There’s nothing real about that. Okay? You and I, we’re what’s real. You and I are the real happy couple here.”

“ _I KNEW IT!_ ”

Clint and Natasha jumped apart, putting space between themselves as Tony Stark rounded the corner. 

“I knew it! Totally knew it,” Tony crowed happily, approaching them. “Tiny agents, pregnant agent, fake. All of it. Beautiful! Well done, you,” he pointed to Clint. “And Cap owes me $100, I’ve known you guys were a couple for a year. _God,_ I love winning, especially against him.” Clint and Natasha darted their eyes to each other so quickly he had to have missed it, panic lighting both their eyes, trying to silently come to a consensus about their new predicament. _What do we do now?_

He put his hands on Clint and Natasha’s shoulders and leaned in conspiratorially, as if to make grand plans.

“Now, of course you know, this cat is out of the bag. I know now, and that’s that. I’m _probably_ going to have to go tell everyone what I now know....” Tony winced and rocked his head back and forth as if he were considering the possibilities. “Although...there are some options, I suppose.”

He stepped back and leaned against Clint’s tractor, crossing his arms and eyeing the two of them carefully. Clint and Natasha both took a small, unconscious step towards the other. “The protocol was only in place to see how long you’d keep up the charade. Nobody cares if you two are a couple. Everyone thinks the two of you are meant for each other. It’s so obvious. Glad to say I won about half of the betting pools.” Clint and Natasha darted another look at each other. _Betting pools? Are we off the hook, here?_

Tony went on, “but the big question here is...would one of you want to move into the others’ floor at Avengers tower? I’m really _dying_ for another floor of the lab, but Pepper won’t let me add on. Want to work out a deal?”


End file.
